It seems as if I wait too long between each post.
I have become embarassed at how much weight I have put on over the years. When I went away to Grad school it was the smallest weight I had been as an adult. I am now larger than than I was on the day that I gave birth to my daughter. I struggle each day. I keep thinking how did I get here. But, I know how I got here. I ate too much. I ate secretly, I ate in my car, I ate things that no one else knew I was eating. By what I eat in front of other people I should lose weight. But what I eat in the shadows is what is preventing me from moving forward.
I have a weight loss coach now. She definately keep me honest about what I am doing. She pushes me to change my habits, my thinking, and to stay true to my path...my plan...my vision.
The other day I was looking in the mirror..my whole body and realized that I am way larger than I invision myself. I breathed in and shook my head...all I can is focus and move forward.
One thing that is helping me is the phrase "I am committed..not interested..in losing weight" " I am committed". This is hard to keep in my mind when I feel upset..I have always gone straight for food when I am upset. I was in the grocery store this week...thinking I really wanted a cupcake...how does one go about buying only one cupcake now..since most groceries sell cupcakes only by 6 or a dozen. hmm...I walked through..looked at everything...and kept going...those moments..I won...I made the choice I wanted to...
Let's see how this week goes.
